I have a habit of zoning out. Quite excessively. And it’s getting me in a lot of trouble nowadays.
Besides, how is it my fault if others refuse to speak anything remotely interesting or funny? Before you ask, no, I am not mad. My mom had me tested. (Thank you Dr.Sheldon Cooper).
If the other party is boring me to death, however important what he/she might be talking about, my imagination takes over and I start to think about the most random stuff and it goes something like this;
‘Miley Cyrus used to be so innocent. Look at her now. I think Hannah Montana was just an illusion created by Disney, when actually the real Miley was hiding under the façade of a fake, perfect pop star who was all Miss Goody Two Shoes. Ugh! Disney! Why do they always have to make movies about “The Perfect Princess”?! YEAH! What’s up with that Disney?! Seriously, you should realise that are influencing thousands of kids out there! Not cool dude! Although “Brave” was pretty good. Wait! Was that a Disney movie? Who cares! That chick was totally awesome with her archery. Wonder if I can learn archery….Hmmm… Maybe I will take it up this summer.’
This is the point when someone violently shakes my shoulder or shouts in my ear and all I can think about is ‘I NEED to know if “BRAVE” is a Disney movie’.
So the other day, we were having our lab practical and our Professor was explaining a procedure to our class while we were taking notes. I, as usual, being lost in another time, another place, and another universe, missed out on a sentence.
Unfortunately, this was the time that my stupid brain chose to teleport me back to the present (I have no control over when I return, unless someone really agitates me). Annddd this is what happened (At least according to me. My classmates tell an entirely different story.);
PROF. : So this is a blah blah procedure in which blah, blah, and blah can be used for testing their hardness.
CLASS : Sir, can you cut it short please?
PROF. : You see, I cannot. I am just following the manual. If you have any problems with my teaching take it up with the HOD. But then if you do, don’t ask me how you got such low scores on your internals. *His lips stretch around his teeth and across his face a.k.a a demonic smile* (Ugh!!)
CLASS : *Groans in unison*
God! What is wrong with this guy?!
What a douche!
Omg! It’s so hot in here!
PROF. : Now where was I….. Ahh… So in blah blah procedure a 2.5mm —– balls are taken and fitted to the ends of the blah device to….
*This is when I am teleported to the present*
ME : What balls Sir?
*Pin drop silence*
ME : *Buries head on the desk and wishes the earth would open up and swallow me whole*
CLASS : *Starts guffawing and howling*
PROF : *Has no idea what is going on. Tries to control the class. Fails miserably. Taps on my desk *
ME : *Lifts head*
PROF. : *Giving the evil eye*
You don’t even know what a ball is? Hmph! You are not fit for engineering!!
CLASS : *Breaks into even more hysterical laughter and hooting*
Hey Jean! What ya? You don’t even know what a ball is?!
Yo! How many times will the poor Prof. explain? They are 2.5mm of diameter and are made of-*Bends down and chortles*
Sir, I think our Jean is a little slow. Maybe a demo would make things clear.
ME : *Mutters* Kill me already.
After class I borrowed my friend’s notes and found the rogue sentence that was causing all the drama;
‘In Brinell’s hardness test, a 2.5mm diameter steel ball is used as indentor.’
My dearest reader,
Whatever you do, do NOT zone out. Ever! It’s deadly. It’s dangerous. It’s addictive. Better get rid of it a.s.a.p. It’s hazardous to your health and your reputation. Learn from my mistakes instead of making your own. It will prevent you from wasting time and time is of essence.